Looking Forward to Yellowstone Erupting: 10 Reasons

1. The plane that fell into the Indian Ocean can take a news nap, so we can hear about something enthralling.

2. I’ve never had the chance to see the park, and people always brag about how beautiful it is, so now they can shut up.

3. I’ll get the chance to need my new flashlight, and it will be a great reminder to replace the batteries.

4. If I’m lucky enough to have it coincide with massive earthquake activity, the neighbor who is bringing down my property value with their hovel, won’t be a problem anymore, because their horribly built shit shack, will cave in.

5. Natural disaster brings out people’s self-preservation instinct, so I’ll get more insight into who is spiritually awesome enough to preserve communities, and who just wants to be alive.

6. Wyoming is a boring sparsely populated state full of grass, so watching nature throw a party there would be pretty excellent.

7. So what if only the stupid one’s are left, lava cooked Bison meat sounds tasty.

8. When the dust is done forming clouds of sheet lightning shows, it’ll get wet from rain and take out our electric systems, which would mean that the local utility guys could be bribed, to extend our bicycle tours and sail boat adventures.

9. Father time has been tickling Mother Earth’s fancy under the covers for too long, so wouldn’t it be great if her satisfaction spilled onto the international stage?

10. All of the hoarders from the Great Depression, Y2K, The World Banks, Zombie Apocalypse Fanatics, and WalMart would have a chance to share the stock pile of goods they’ve set aside for us.

Advertisements

The pharmacy of your mind prescribing for my pleasure

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s